Sakuno's True Calling
by Dark Nadeshiko
Summary: No, Sakuno's not destined to be Ryoma's cheerleader for the rest of her life. Instead, when she finds her inner self, she teams up with Niou and Fuji to wreak havoc. NiouXSakunoXFuji if you squint. But if I find that people want more romance, I can add so


Dark Nadeshiko-Enjoy!

* * *

When we first meet the different teams, once we establish their good looks and moves, little quirks start to show up. Sakuno, being a perfectly normal girl, has often wondered about these quirks, but has never had the gall to voice what she was thinking. When would quiet, timid little Sakuno pluck up the courage to these intimidating tennis players? 100 of never is Inui's guess, but even predictable little Sakuno can defy Inui's data when she discovers her true calling. 

Follow this story to find out just how the teams react when Echizen's number one fan, other than Tomoka, finds her inner self.

Ah, its April fools day, even though it's not particularly commonly celebrated in Japan, it is Niou's favorite holiday of the year, other than Halloween. To make it even sweeter this year, he plans to skip school today and see the reactions of Seigaku's regulars to the gag gifts he and Sakuno had got for them.

I know what you're all thinking, Sakuno and Niou? How the hell do they even know each other? Precisely three days ago, Niou had been snipping about the Seigaku regulars inside a chat room. Soon, everyone had left Niou to himself, that's when Sakuno stumbled onto it. Realizing who it was, she proposed an idea. Niou, being Niou, immediately agreed.

Everything was planned, the trap was set, and the bait was laid. Now all they had to do was sit back and enjoy the show. Niou had lots of experience in this; one should not linger for too long, lest they arouse suspicion. Don't look too innocent, one must act casual and snicker with the crowd.

* * *

Tezuka strode in majestically into the locker room, opening his to place his shoes inside; he braced himself for the onslaught of notes and gifts that would come gushing out. Lo and behold…a fountain of perfumed stationary and confectionary poured out, and riding on the crest of the wave was a particularly large package. Wasn't it several periods too early for bentos? He wondered, watching it surf the tide of paper and fly over the waterfall. 

Just to land directly on his toe. For the first time in who knows how long, one of his facial muscles moves, only a twitch, but it still moved! He bent down to remove the offending object, it was rather heavy. He tore off the wrapping, on the hideously bright yellow of the cover, where the words; **'Small Talk, Greetings, and Conversation Starters for Socially Challenged Dummies'**. Another twitch, ohhhhh…if this turns out to be another one of the regulars' tricks, he going to make sure they run so many laps that not even amputating their legs would relieve the pain.

He glanced at it again, were they calling him a dummy? Even more laps, and several barrels of Inui's juices. His inner Tezuka, the one that guards all the locked up emotions, laughed manically. Sigh, Fuji was starting to rub off on him.

He started to mechanically pick up all the notes on the ground and disposed of them in a near by trash can, conveniently placed five lockers down just for his use. Weighing the book in his hand, he wondered whether or not to burn it. Instead, he grabbed his other books and left for class.

'**Chapter One; Conversation Starters with Strangers-Are you the type that sits on the bus ignoring all the other passengers? Make the bus ride more interesting and see who takes the bus daily so you can have someone to talk to! Make a comment to yourself and maybe someone will reply! Great conversation starters; the weather, sports, news, holidays and popular activities such as computer games.'**

You never know when he might need it one day right? This would also confuse the heck out of the regulars, you can never be too scared of your buchou! Sigh, must stay away from Fuji.

* * *

Oishi had woken up that morning in a wonderfully helpful mood. He had made breakfast for his entire family, washed the dishes and even vacuumed before leaving for morning practice. While unlocking the club room he never noticed two pairs of watchful eyes. 

"So, you ready?" Niou whispered as Oishi went inside to change. "You better hurry, Fuji says that Inui always arrives at exactly eight, that gives you half an hour to drive him crazy."

"Hai!" Sakuno took out a tube of wasabi and squirted some out.

"Good, here, take this. I better go and hide." He climbed up into a tree to watch the show.

Oishi walked out of the club room, he had reorganized everything so no one would slip and fall on any stray equipment. All of a sudden, his motherly instincts flared. He could hear sniffles from behind the building. Worried that someone was in trouble, he went to find the source of the crying. Who did his find but Ryuuzaki-sensei's granddaughter!

"Ryuuzaki!" He rushed to her side, "What's wrong? Why are you crying? You're not hurt are you?"

"Iie," Sakuno sniffled, "But I have a big problem!"

Oishi was a big softie, "What is it? Maybe I can help?"

She pulled out a small rubix cube, "Obaa-san says that if I can't solve this puzzle, she's going to stop coaching me in tennis! I don't want that, but I don't know how to fix it!" She burst out in a new wave of tears.

Oishi was too busy comforting her to wonder at the logic of her explanation. "Don't worry Ryuuzaki, I'll try and fix it!" He gently took the toy from her.

"Really?" Sakuno peered up at him, trying to stifle a snicker. "But that would be cheating! What if obaa-san finds out?"

"I won't tell a soul." Oishi promised.

"Thank you so much Oishi-sempai!" She bowed and sped off, "I'm depending on you!"

Niou followed discreetly before the regulars discovered him. "Ryuuzaki?"

He found her at the water fountains, with her head under the spout. "Hot hot hot hot!" She cried, "Next time, you do the crying!" She dabbed at her streaming eyes, "It was so hard not to burst out screaming while Oishi-sempai was talking! I don't know how Fuji-sempai does it!" She grumbled.

Niou rolled his eyes, "School's about to start, I'm going to take a nap. You better go to class."

He found a convenient patch of shade and lay down to sleep. While he was peacefully enjoying his time, Oishi was starting to get extremely frustrated, no not at his extremely quirky teammates, but at the small cube he had taken from Sakuno. By first period he was muttering madly to himself while rotating that evil little cube.

"Ah!" He fretted, " What am I going to do? Ryuuzaki is depending on me to continue her tennis education! I could be stopping the progress of a wonderful player! As her sempai, I must solve this! Seigaku protects her own, ahhhh! Must solve puzzle! Tears! Tennis! Cube! Kohai! AHHHH!" He had already ceased to make sense.

Because of that…..thing, he failed a quiz, spilled his juice on his lap, got a detention, ran extra laps, tripped up, yes, up, two flights of stairs, and down several others. But noble Oishi wasn't about to give up. He knew that the cube had a mind of its own; it was probably the one that convinced Ryuuzaki-sensei to start that wager with Ryuuzaki junior! He knew what was going on, and he wasn't about to let it happen! He would prevail over it! Muhahaha!

Mumbling manically to himself, he sat on a bed inside the nurse's office on his quest to defeat the evil rubix cube! The bell rang; it was time for afternoon practice. He paled. The cube had beaten him! Nooooooo! What was he supposed to tell Ryuuzaki now? Her confidence in her sempai-tachi would be ruined forever! How could he face his friends? His family? The nurse kicked Oishi out of her office; his crazed talk was driving her nuts!

"Oishi-sempai!" The freshmen trio chorused. Oishi nodded numbly before following them to the tennis courts. "Ano, Oishi-sempai?" It was Kachiro, "Isn't that a rubix cube?" He grabbed it from his frozen hands, "It looks like you've put it though quite a lot and the stickers are fading." He twisted it several times, "Here you go!"

"Ahh…" Oishi dejectedly went to find Ryuuzaki, this was all his fault. He should quit the team to make up for his terrible sin. Yes, that's what he'd do. He approached Tezuka and told him his plan. He said something about thinking it over, but Oishi had already walked off to find Ryuuzaki. He found her in under a tree, ah, what a nice place. He could die of shame peacefully here.

"Ryuuzaki…" Oishi handed her the cube, "Gomen, gomen gomen! I couldn't solve the evil cube of squares! I couldn't defeat it! It's all my fault!" He started to sob hysterically, "I knew it had a mind of its own, it'll start probably stop everyone from playing tennis soon! It's all an evil plot to defeat Seigaku form the inside! But I couldn't stop it!"

Sakuno looked around carefully, good, everyone was watching, but no one knew what was going on. "Ne, Oishi-sempai? Obaa-san says it was only an April fool's joke! Demo, the cube is solved anyways."

"But it's all my fault! I-" He stopped, something twitched, "WHAT? It must have been Kachiro! Ha! He has vanquished the dark forces of our enemies!" He danced around the tree like a retard, "Seigaku prevails!" Everyone was watching in sick fascination.

"Ne Oishi-sempai, since you seem to like it so much, why don't you solve these too?" She handed him a cloth bag, "I have to go now! Ja!"

Oishi waved enthusiastically, "What a nice girl, I wonder what's in the bag?" He peered inside, then, something snapped.

"AAAHHHHHH! They're out to get us! The dark forces are nearing! Everyone run for your lives! I will vanquish the evil that's approaching! Super Oishi! Muhahahaha!" Everyone was freaking out, Tezuka considered calling for the men with the white jackets to take him away, or maybe he should ask the archery club for a tranquilizer gun?

* * *

"Nya! Ohayo Oishi!" Kikumaru glomped his partner, "What are you doing? Hoi hoi?" 

"Ah!" Oishi stuffed his hands into his pocket, "What are you talking about? I'm not doing anything morally wrong!" His eyes shifted nervously, sweat trickled down his forehead, "I-I-I mean…ohayo Eiji! Wow, look at the time, practice is about to start, better get going! Ja!" He ran off at a speed that Fudomine's Kamio would envy.

"Nya? But the courts are in the opposite direction…" Kikumaru scratched his head, "Ah! I better get changed or else buchou will make me run laps!"

"Nya! Everyone one is acting weird today!" Kikumaru complained during lunch, "Don't you think so Taka-san?"

"R-R-Really?" Kawamura shifted in his seat nervously, "I haven't noticed."

"Hoi! Oishi keeps on muttering about evil cubes and dark forces, Inui won't stop going on about chickens, Momo is going around with a paper bag over his head and even Tezuka is different today!"

"Buchou? Really? He seems the same to me." Kawamura pulled out his bento.

"Haven't you heard him nya?" Kikumaru exclaimed, "He's been saying weird stuff all morning! To make it even scarier," He shuddered, "He started a conversation with me at break! Without anyone to make him!"

"So?"

"About the weather!" Kikumaru wailed, "The world is coming to an end! You're the only one that sane anymore!"

"Ah," Kawamura opened his bento, "Ahh!"

"Nya? What's wrong?"

"I told you already! I'm too old for bears! Get away! Get away! Ahhhhh!" He ran away screaming.

"…hoi…I guess all that's left is Fuji." Eiji sighed, "…on the other hand, I think I should have some along time."

"Everyone is so scary today!" Eiji moaned as he opened his locker, "Nya? What's this?" He picked up a tube of plastic, "What's inside? Huh? Hey!" Eiji had just discovered the wonders of the Chinese finger trap. Don't you just love them? "Why won't you come off? Nya!"

Eiji's index fingers were now in the unforgiving clutches of the trap, "This isn't funny anymore! How am I going to play tennis like this?"

Spotting Inui going into the club room, Eiji raced after him. "Inui! Inui! Help me get this off!"

"Kikumaru, what do you think came first?" Inui asked him seriously, "The chicken or the egg?"

"…hoi…the egg?"

"But what gave birth to the egg? The chicken of course! But a chicken is born from an egg!" Inui raved, "Egg from the chicken, from the egg, from the chicken, to the egg-"

"You know what? I think I'll ask someone else for help." He edged quickly away. "Fuji! Fuji!"

"Hm?"

"I need help! I can't get this thing off me!" Eiji showed him is connected fingers.

"Saa.." Fuji examined the woven tube, "This looks serious."

"Can you get it off?"

"Looks like you need surgery," Fuji said, shaking his head, "And good thing I got this too!" He pulled out a box labeled scalpels. "Let's get to work shall we?"

"Ahhhhh!" Eiji raced to the protection of Tezuka. "Nya! Buchou! My fingers are stuck together and Fuji says I need to get them amputated!" He cried, "How am I supposed to play tennis? I can't even take off my shirt to change! How can I take baths? I'm going to stick forever! I won't be able to cheer John on when he's fighting bigger turtles! Stop talking about the weather damn it!"

Something twitched, "A hundred laps!"

A hundred laps later, Eiji collapsed in a bench. "Kikumaru, go play a game with Kawamura when he gets here." Tezuka ordered.

"Buchou!" Eiji whined, "I don't think I can move anymore!"

"Play or a hundred more laps."

"HORA HORA! BUUUURRRNNING! FUWA-CHAN AND I WILL KICK ALL YOUR ASSES! BUUURNING BAAABBBYYY!" They could see Kawamura rushing into the court hold what looked like…a teddy bear?

"You know what? I think I'll take those laps instead." Eiji giggled fearfully, "Ja!"

* * *

Inui walked to school by himself, 86 chance that today would be a non-productive day. He watched as Eiji arrived and spotted Oishi, 97 of glompage, glomp. Oishi was muttering to himself, hmmmm..Ii data. 74 that Oishi had finally cracked under stress of worrying. 

A girl walked up to him. Hmm…Ryuuzaki Sakuno. Freshman. Age 13. Weighs 42 kg. 148 cm tall. Class 2B. Likes Echizen. Shy, quiet, polite. 94.7 that she wants to ask me a question. 83 that it's about Echizen.

"Ohayo Inui-sempai." She bowed politely, "Ano, I was wondering…"

"Hai?"

"…do you know…"

An eyebrow rose.

"…what came first…"

"Go on."

"The chicken or the egg?" She burst out, "Demo, I was thinking about it last night and I still don't know!"

"Hmm…not about Echizen. Ii data." Now, back to her question, "The chicken or the egg?"

"Hai," Sakuno looked at him innocently, "I thought it was the egg at first, but then, who lay it? But then where did the chicken that laid it come from? An egg of course! So…I was hoping you would be able to find out."

"I'll tell you when I find out." Inui nodded to her while scribbling over a new page in this notebook. Not even looking up as she skipped off, he never noticed that a certain silver haired trickster was congratulating her on a job well done.

"Chicken or the egg." Inui looked at the diagram he had drawn in his book. So far, he had gotten that an egg comes from a female chicken, so a hen, and all chickens like all fowl, are born from fertilized eggs.

So if the chicken came first, it would have to be born from an egg. But if an egg came first, how was it created? By a hen and a rooster of course! But then they come from two different eggs, which could have either been created by two hens and a rooster, or one hen and a rooster, or a hen and two roosters! Ah, the possibilities!

That day, all the teachers wondered what had caused their star student to be so detached from the class. Even Tezuka was speaking more than him! The latest results from the history exam distracted Inui from his pondering. At last, it was lunch. He opened his bento box.

Rice with corn and chicken and eggs!

Staring at his lunch, he decided that it was fate that he finally discover when came first. Even his lunch was trying to tell him that! He never considered that this was what he had for dinner last night, or that he never believed in fate. Ah well, back to the drawing board! Now, the egg or the chicken?

Abandoning his lunch, he set about to solving the question that has plagued us for millennia.

Before he knew it, school was over and Tezuka was ordering him to go change for practice. Despite his daze, he knew that he would be running laps if he didn't hurry.

"Inui! Inui! Help me get this off!" Huh? Kikumaru? Inui sighed, he couldn't believe he was lowering himself to ask this, but here goes.

"Kikumaru, what do you think came first?" Inui asked him seriously, "The chicken or the egg?"

He looked at him strangely, "…hoi…the egg?"

He had gotten that theory too, "But what gave birth to the egg? The chicken of course! But a chicken is born from an egg!" He raved, "Egg from the chicken, from the egg, from the chicken, to the egg, then back to the chicken again!" He looked around, "Where'd he go?"

And so, our favorite data man spent the rest of his day and most of the night too, musing this. Then, just as the sun was rising, he bolted up in his chair. "Haha! I have the answer! The cow came first! Muhaha!" At last, satisfied with his conclusion, he lay down to sleep. In the nest room over, his parents, whom he had woken up, were constipating whether he had been hit in the head once too many during tennis or his glass were just a tad too strong for him to handle.

* * *

"Takashi!" A small woman bustled around in a neat kitchen, "Wake up!" 

"O-O-Ohayo okaa-san." Her tall son yawned, "What's for breakfast?"

"Your favorite!" She set down a steaming plate of food, "Say, I was vacuuming your room yesterday and I noticed that the bear you keep on the shelf was gone."

"Oh, that? I threw it out during spring cleaning last week. I'm too old for bears."

"Tsk tsk tsk, one can never be too old for stuffed animals!" She whisked his plate into the sink, "Now hurry to school!" As luck would have it, Sakuno, whom had been walking home last week had found the bear sitting among a box of other junk and decided to take it home with her.

"Ohayo Oishi." Kawamura called, Oishi jumped a foot in the air and scuttled off. "Was it something I did?"

He opened his locker door, sitting on top of his shoes was a tiny bear, an exact replica of the one he threw out. Around its neck was a note, 'Hug me!'

"What's this doing here? I'm too old for bears." He tossed it into the trash, into a sea of what looked to be Tezuka's daily dosage of love notes and snacks.

"Ohayo Taka-san." Fuji called cheerfully.

"Ah, ohayo Fujiko-chan." He replied, setting his books down, "Huh?" Inside his desk was the bear, 'Hug me!'. "How did this get here?" He threw it in the trash, again.

"Math pop-quiz!" The teacher handed out the papers, "You have fifteen minutes!"

Kawamura scrambled for his bag to get his pencil, the bear was waiting for him. 'Hug me!' "Oh no! I thought I threw you out, Again!"

"Kawamura! Is there a problem?"

"No sensei!" He discreetly lobbed the bear out the open window when she turned her back. By lunch, he was going completely insane, the damned bear was showing up everywhere! Inside his gym clothes, his wooden box for a project, a pitcher he pulled out of the cupboard in home economics, in his English binder, and on his favorite bench to sit on during break. Everywhere he looked, there it was. And that annoying sign!

He met Kikumaru on the roof to each lunch together, he check everywhere to make sure it was gone. Kikumaru didn't notice while he complained about everyone acting weird.

"R-R-Really?" Kawamura shifted in his seat nervously, "I haven't noticed." His eyes scanned the vicinity of the roof, he had already checked under pipes, between the boxes and under tarps, but no sign of the bear. Thank god! Freedom!

Relaxing, he began to pay more attention to what Kikumaru was saying, "Buchou? Really? He seems the same to me." He pulled out his bento, maybe some food would sooth his nerves.

"Haven't you heard him nya?" Kikumaru exclaimed, "He's been saying weird stuff all morning! To make it even scarier," He shuddered, "He started a conversation with me at break! Without anyone to make him!"

"So?" There's nothing wrong with Tezuka finally learning how to converse with others without making them run laps…right?

"About the weather!" Kikumaru wailed, "The world is coming to an end! You're the only one that sane anymore!" Really? Not with that bear around he's not.

"Ah," Kawamura opened his bento, "AHH!" Sitting quite snuggly between his rice and salad, was that irritating bear. 'Hug me!'

"Nya? What's wrong?"

"I told you already! I'm too old for bears! Get away! Get away! Ahhhhh!" He ran away screaming. He had to dispose of it! Permanently!

As he passed by Fuji, he grabbed his knife and began hacking away at the bear. "Now you can't bother me anymore!" He tossed the mutilated corpse of the bear down, "Hah! Thanks Fujiko-chan!" He walked off whistling cheerfully.

The bear didn't show up during science. Or history. Not even during art, the last period of the day. He was free! He went to change for practice in a good mood, not aware of Oishi's crazed muttering of evil cubes, or of Inui and his strange obsession with eggs and chickens.

He changed into the regular's polo shirt and jacket. Folding his clothes neatly, he placed them into his bag. He walked to his cubby hole to retrieve his racquet, and there it was, sitting in all its full-sized furry glory, was the bear. "Hug me!'

"I give up, you win." He reached out and pulled the bear into a hug. "Let's go to practice now. He ambled out.

"A teddy bear Kawamura-sempai?" Arai asked, "Why do you have that?"

"Taka-san! Your racquet!" Fuji handed it to him, smiling sadistically.

"Sankyuu." He took it, "HORA HORA! BUUUURRRNNING! FUWA-CHAN AND I WILL KICK ALL YOUR ASSES! BUUURNING BAAABBBYYY!"

Hugging the bear, Fuwa, to his chest, he swung his racquet around dangerously. "BUUURNING!" He ran into the tennis courts, only to be beaned by a stray smash. "Ohh…I see pretty colours…" He fell to the ground in a dead faint.

* * *

Niou, (Remember him?) almost fell out the tree laughing, "Oh my god!" He gasped for air, "We have to thank Fuji for helping us ne Sakuno?" He looked down, "Sakuno?" 

She was kneeling on the ground, choking in laughter. "Bears. Ball. Faint. Pretty colours." She ground out between gulps of air.

* * *

That morning, Fuji just knew it would be a wonderful day. I mean, come on! The sky looked like it was about to rain. The temperature was almost at freezing. And all the birds had finally shut up. All that drugged birdseed really worked! 

His sister drove him to school. Who was that at the gates? He squinted "Niou? Sakuno-chan?"

"Ah, Fuji-sempai! Ohayo!" Sakuno bowed.

"Yo." Niou nodded, "You know what today is?"

"Um…April the first?" Fuji brightened, "Its April Fool's day!"

"Yup, and as the local sadist and trickster, you are qualified to join our activities for the day."

"Our? As in you and Sakuno-chan?"

"Yup! Don't ask." He saw the look on his face, "Now, we've arranged a plan of action already. With you in the group, it'll make it a lot easier. You can go to places we want without looking too suspicious."

"Alright, tell me the plan and what I get out of it."

"Well, other than to see your teammates go completely insane, get blackmail material, and watch them suffer." Ooo, this sounds like fun.

"We've also taken the liberty of getting this kit for you." Sakuno presented a tin box labeled scalpels. "We each have one that holds all the supplies we'll need for everything."

"We're going to need scalpels?" Fuji asked a bit too eagerly.

"Sadly, no. But I thought you'd like the box." Niou grinned, "Open it, I'll tell you what you have to do."

"…is that Mizuki!" Fuji's eyes opened, "What is that…thing he's wearing?"

"Ah, that saves you the problem of knocking anyone that accidentally opens your box." Sakuno explained, "Scary isn't it? I never thought he'd be _that_ attached to purple."

"Me neither, now tell me the plan."

* * *

Momo walked, no wait, strutted inside the school. "Hmm? What's this?" In his locker was a brown paper bag, with a note attached. "Momoshiro Takashi-sama, we would like to remind you that your beauty is too great to be seen by mere mortal eyes such as ours. Your stunning good looks blind us. We would very much appreciate it if you wear this over your face lest we be distracted during class. Your faithful admirers." He read out loud. 

"It's about time someone noticed how wonderful I am!" He preened, "And who am I to disagree?" He pulled the paper bag over his head, "I don't want anyone to faint when they see my beautiful face!" I think Atobe's character has rubbed a bit off on Momo, don't you think so?

"Momoshiro? Why are you wearing that?" His teacher asked, not even bothering to look up. She was used to the eccentric personalities of the tennis regulars.

"Ah, ohayo sensei! I'm saving you the shock of seeing my face by covering it!" The corners of the bag crinkled as Momo grinned widely.

"…right…" She sighed, this wasn't in the job description, "Go and sit down."

"Hai!" He skipped to his desk, mistaking the confused glances for admiration.

""Fsshhh, your big head is blocking the board!" Kaidoh hissed, moving to pull off the paper bag.

"Iie!" Momo slapped his hands on his head, "Do you want all the innocent people in the class to faint when they see my face? I never thought you were that cold hearted mamushi!"

"Fsshhh, so you finally see it my way." Kaidoh smirked.

"Momo! What's that on your head?" Eiji pulled it off, "How are you supposed to eat nya?"

"Kyaaa!" Momo shrieked, "Don't look at me!" He felt around blindly and jammed the bag over his head again. "I don't want anyone to get sent to the nurses'." He grabbed his bento, "I better eat somewhere alone."

"Hoi…Momo too?" Eiji sighed, "Taka-san! Come eat lunch with me!"

Sigh, "It's so hard to hide my beautiful face from everyone!" Momo moaned, it was gym class and he had just realized how difficult it was to play basketball with only two small eye holes.

"Momo! Look-"

"Hmm?" Orange filled his small range of vision, and then all went black.

"-out…"

When he woke up, he found that he was in the nurses' office. Oishi sat on a bed across the room muttering madly. "Oishi-sempai?" Then he realized, "AHHHH! Where's my bag? OH MY GOD!"

"Nani? What happened?" The nurse rushed into the room.

"AHHH! Don't look at me!" Momo covered his face.

"…I think that ball hit you a little too hard," The nurse picked up a phone, "Do you want to go home to rest?" Momo was already gone, "Tsk tsk tsk, kids these days."

Since he couldn't find his paper bag, Momo showed up for afternoon with his gym shorts swathed around his head. Silence reigned over the courts, "Momoshiro…was your injury really that serious?" Tezuka asked, mistaking the shorts for bandages, "Sit out for practice today, you can play again when you can take those off."

"Hai…"

Thump…Kaidoh fell to the floor in a dead faint.

* * *

"I can't believe Momoshiro-sempai actually fell for that." Sakuno commented. 

Niou shrugged, "At least this way, we've found out that he's never look in a mirror before."

Earlier that day, Kaidoh jogged to school just in time to see Niou jump down from a tree. "Fsshh….oi! What are you doing here?"

"Shit!" Niou swore, "Oh, it's only you."

"Fssh…answer my question."

"I really shouldn't be telling you this, but don't all evil villains reveal there plans?" Niou looked around carefully, "I'm here to defeat Seigaku, by using my outer worldly powers. I'm going to stop all the regulars from playing by making them go crazy! Then Rikkai Dai will rule supreme as the all powerful tennis kings! Muhahahaha."

"….right…" Kaidoh slouched off to class.

"Quick thinking," Sakuno praised, "I thought you were busted there."

"Feh," Niou scoffed, "We forgot about Kaidoh, but I'm sure Fuji will take care of that."

"Fsshhh, your big head is blocking the board!" Kaidoh hissed, moving to pull off the paper bag.

"Iie!" Momo slapped his hands on his head, "Do you want all the innocent people in the class to faint when they see my face? I never thought you were that cold hearted mamushi!" So Momo has realized how ugly he is?

"Fsshhh, so you finally see it my way." Kaidoh smirked, he could defiantly get used to this!

He passed by Oishi on the way to the washroom, "Oishi-sempai, you dropped-"

"What are you talking about? Are you in liege with the evil cube too? Nooo! The dark forces are taking over the kohai! I must save them! Muhahahaha!" He ran off, and fell down the stairs.

"…fsssshh?"

"Ahhh!" It was Inui, "Snake! You want to eat the egg don't you? I won't let you! The chicken will prevail! But the egg comes from the chicken, and the chicken from the egg. You want to eat the chicken too don't you? Don't deny it! I can see that gleam in your eyes! Stay away I tell you! Stay away! Back off! Get your own chicken!"

"…." Maybe what Niou said was just bullshit…nah.

…right?

To his left was Fuji-sempai, maybe he knew what was going on. Kawamura-sempai rushed by, he stole his knife and eagerly stabbed at a little bear he was holding. "Now you can't bother me anymore!" The lacerated remains where left to rot in the ground. "Hah!" Kawamura-sempai laughed manically, "Thanks Fujik-chan!"

Kaidoh stared, "What? Did you want a turn too?" Fuji-sempai offered him the knife. Kaidoh backpedaled away.

Practice, tennis would calm him down. Niou as wrong, Seigaku was strong! Buchou would save them!

"Hello Kaidoh," BUCHOU! "Nice weather we've been having these days don't you think?" Ahh! Niou was right! Even buchou had succumbed to his physic powers!

All of the sempai-tachi were down! Wait, Kikumaru-sempai!

"Ahhhhh! Nya! Buchou! My fingers are stuck together and Fuji says I need to get them amputated!" He cried, "How am I supposed to play tennis? I can't even take off my shirt to change! How can I take baths? I'm going to stick forever! I won't be able to cheer John on when he's fighting bigger turtles! Stop talking about the weather damn it!" Oh wait, scratch that thought, he just swore at buchou, nothing could save him now.

Echizen! He was the only one left! He raced over to stand behind him.

Suddenly, Momo showed up with his gym shorts wrapped about his head. No one said a word. "Momoshiro…was your injury really that serious?" Tezuka asked, sounding concerned, defiantly out of character. "Sit out for practice today; you can play again when you can take those off."

"Hai…"

Echizen burst out laughing.

Whoa...Echizen?

Laughing?

Thump…Kaidoh fell to the floor in a dead faint.

* * *

"Echizen!" Sigh…Horio…. 

"What is it now?"

"I found this outside the classroom, it's for you." A giant bottle was shoved in his hands.

"Open for instant social life?" What the hell?

"In my two years of tennis experience I have never met someone with less of a life, this is obviously meant for you."

"Mada mada dane"

"What are you waiting for? Open it!"

Sigh, he did Nothing happened, but the air around him now smelled faintly of bubble gum. A foreign feeling of long out of practice facial muscles pulled at his face.

"Kyyaaaa!" Horio screamed, "Echizen! You're s-s-smiling!"

"Really?" He chirped, "I never noticed! Come on! We don't want to be late for class!" He skipped merrily off.

"RYOMA-SAMA! Ohayo!" Osakada screamed.

"R-r-ryoma-kun!" Sakuno murmured, hiding a smirk, "Ohayo."

"Ohayo Tomoka-chan! Sakuno-chan!" Ryoma flashed them a grin and bounced into his seat.

"…Ryoma-sama called me Tomoka-chan…" She fainted.

"Success!" Sakuno whispered, dropping her friend in her chair.

For the rest of the day Ryoma continued to shock everyone that knew him. He also gained himself several more admirers.

"What a wonderful day!" Ryoma giggled as he skipped to practice. "La la la la la la!"

Momo-sempai walked in with a white turban.

….

He giggled.

Kaidoh-sempai fainted.

"Why is Kaidoh-sempai sleeping? Is it nap time? Is he dead? AHHH! Kaidoh-sempai is dead! WHAAAAA!" He sobbed while clinging onto Tezuka's leg.

"Someone get Kaidoh to the nurse!" Tezuka ordered, "Echizen! Get yourself together!"

"H-h-h-hai!" He blew his nose on Tezuka's shorts.

Twitch…"A hundred laps!"

* * *

"I think the day went pretty well, don't you think so boys?" Sakuno asked. 

"Yup!" Fuji held up a digital camera, "And I got all of it on film too!"

"So, who's next?" Niou asked, rubbing his hands together.

* * *

Dark Nadeshiko- Hey guys! This is my first ficcie. So review and tell me what you think. I don't mind flamers, as long as it's constructive. 


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